13 Steps to become a potential employee

Step 1: Drop in the last minute to office.... (If your boss questions about your late arrival merrily say that one day I'm gonna become a VIP & VIP's always come late...I'm working on it. After all, practice makes perfect)

Step 2: Do not log on right away....go to the rest room freshen up, have unofficial chat with the fellow associates coz.. business oriented talks can spoil your mood in the beginning of the day.. beware of it.

Step 3: Open the outlook and go to the sent items skipping the inbox & check the previously sent emails one after another slowly & steadily.

Step 4: If you find any email/s sent with incorrect data do not attempt to correct it right away though you know what the correction is.

Step 5: Highly complicated technical stuff "but can't help" (press CTRL+ALT+DEL) at the same time to lock your computer.

Step 6: Take a short break (preferably smoking) think about a reason/s to give to your boss for sending erroneous data. If he/she disagrees with you don't take it to heart coz....stress will never allow an employee to perform at the best, keep in mind the mission is to become a potential employee...(Keep marching towards the mission no matter whatever the obstacle is)

Step 7: Compose the corrected e-mail and repeat the previously mentioned highly complicated technical stuff (CTRl+ALT+DEL) it's time to go out for lunch.

Step 8: Go to a restaurant which isn't near by the office, prefer to go by foot coz it's good for health and read the menu as many times you could & order foodstuffs which takes longer than usual to be served.

Step 9: Take a short nap after lunch at the office lobby by covering your face with the news paper on the pretext of brushing up your GK.

Step 10: Make sure you get back to work only when there are 3-4 production hours left.

Step 11: Open the outlook again, read the already composed email again & again coz...one cannot repeat same mistakes, there are so many mistakes to be done.....after all, learning happens only through mistakes.

Step 12: In the last hour send the corrected email to your boss and now open the inbox to check the newly arrived emails. Do not read/respond to all emails at one stretch keep backlog........ sigh out for the day

Step 13: Never accept any new assignment unless you clear the backlog... Make it as a thumb rule. (Most bosses will never understand the technical aspects of the job)

WELCOME TO THE CORPORATE WORLD!!!

Life after college

Apr'04: Worst time of my life, it was then my student life to an end. The poor academics throughout my school and college took me no where. Its obvious that I did not do well in my studies coz I am passionate about music, in fact crazy about it and wished to pursue a career in the field of music dreaming to become like A.R Rahman one day (ha ha ha how foolish I was). After hearing my proposal to pursue a career in music my parents gave me dirty look as if I was trying to become a porn star or something...Like every other Indian parents they did not give a damn about my dreams and passion, all they want me is to byheart what ever the crap printed in the text books and vomit it on the answer sheet. My poor little brains did not give room for anything else apart from music.




May'04: I started looking for a job (not out of my own interest) but just to get away from my parents criticism, however I wasn't able to get through any of the interviews due to the my poor academic records. It was the time when my neighbors & father's friends gave me spiritual and motivational thoughts as if I was about to commit suicide of not getting a job. If had a machine gun I'm sure I would have killed everybody in one round of firing but all I could do was to tell them in a lower voice Fuck off you crazy son of a ***** (some texts missing)


June'04: I hardly read newspapers, sometimes I do read it just to gaze at super sports models particularly Anna kournikova. Anyways whether I like it or not I have to go through the recruitment section at least to save my ass by getting a job. It was like climbing mount everest for me even to get a interview call after scoring so bad throughout my academics top of that my poor little brains had no clue where to begin with. One of my Intellectual friend ( even now I wonder how I got his friendship) briefed me about the booming call center industry he suggested me to give a shot at any of the top notch BPO's however it wasn't easy either to get a job in top notch call centers, the first eligibility criteria is to speak fluent English (I told myself clean bowled). I knew the probability of getting a job in leading BPO's is very less, in fact I was kicked out in the first round of the interview just because of the fucking american accent. I wanted to tell the HR person hey loser I am not a native English speaker neither you then why the hell you act like an American by tripping and flipping your tongue you......(some texts are missing)


July'04: It was the time lots of BPO's mushroomed in most parts of the city and there was huge demand for voice process (Basic requirement is speak to English or 'English like') so that the person (usually customers in US & UK) on the other end shouldn't feel he/she is talking to an alien from another planet or something...so it OK for the B grade companies to recruit people who can speak at least little bit of English, this is where I exactly fit.


Aug'04: Day by day things got worst at home I couldn't help indulging in verbal war with my parents when the question is about my job. I am an emotional kind of guy misunderstood my parents feelings and decided to run away from home, again I couldn't execute the plan as I didn't even have a single penny in my pocket.


Sep'04: " Chennai" I thought it was the best destination for a person like me to get into the call center industry. Though Chennai is the intellectual capital of India, the city barely had English speaking community then (Not any more) for the first time in my entire life my plan worked out I did get a job in the BPO sector after many hardships and my first salary was 6000 bucks excluding 2000 bucks as the incentive.

The Gr8 political drama

Like every other Indian I wish my country to be a developed nation, but in reality it will never happen.. sorry to say this.....

I hate when somebody says India is the third largest economy in the world next to China. Statistically it is right however there is a huge gap between India and China. Every time I browse through the newspapers I used to wonder what made China to excel on the global platform and after some research and analysis I feel it is the robust political system which makes China a prominent leader of the world.

Unlike the other countries China has a unique political system in place called "Single party system" so there is no room for the blame games, whereas in India there are National parties, state parties and hundreds of unrecognized parties which makes the democracy to dance to its own tunes, top of that new political parties mushroom every now and then with a sole intention of benefiting a section of people or community.

Many political parties do not work on the national interest. They give a damn about the real burning issues say it is an unemployment problem which is the root cause of many criminal activities or the rising inflation rate etc.., instead they divert people's attention to petty issues like the IPL T20 who cares if Modi is being sacked from the post of IPL commissioner after all Lalith Modi, BCCI, franchisees, players and Broadcaster have already made millions of rupees at the cost of people's time. Even the media should be penalized for blowing things out of proportion and airing it all day long to increase their TRP rate.

It is our responsibility to send the right message, after all it is individuals who forms a community and a group of communities form the nation.

The girl I love the most

To begin with let me give a brief introduction. I am employed by an US based health care company for it's offshore operations in India, in simple language its called B.P.O (Business Process Outsourcing) extending our support and service to American doctors & Hospitals. Most of Bpo's operates during night times due to the geographical difference with other countries.

Everything started here.

At office it was the day of unfortunate events that screwed up my happiness, mistakes of least significance were blown out of proportion. I was running out of mind and I desperately needed a smoke so, I went to the cafeteria grabbed a cup of coffee and started to enter the smoker's zone (only place where employees are allowed to smoke).

On my way out to smoker's zone, I saw an angel with a bunch of colleagues (All of 'em were new recruits). I stopped for a while and I had no control over my mind & soul. My eyes were popping out and I stood there with no clue. she is young, beautiful & southern, kind of MY GIRL. Unfortunately I had to get back to work in quick time.

I was back to my desk after a short break, soon after I occupied my seat the phone started to ring and it was my boss on the other end I prepared myself to face the worst case scenario, to my surprise my boss told me that things have been straightened out his last word made feel better and the shift came to an end I wrapped my stuffs and took the office transportation to reach home. Back home I was so tired that I slept like a baby.

The next day in the elevator THE GIRL was standing right beside me..it was such a great feeling as if I was floating on air. I wanted to get introduced to her but I was running out of words, my heart started to beat 100 times faster than ever & her beauty was killing me. believe it or not all that happened in a couple of minutes.

Whenever I see her I used to wonder is she an athlete? coz.. she keeps running in my mind all the time. Days passed and I did not see her much often once in a while we used to meet occasionally at the cafeteria. Though we hardly know each other one thing is for sure we have some thing in common. I made few attempts to make her understand without her I feel "half of my world is away from me" but my attempts failed, probably she is sending a message TRY HARDER STUPID.